Redefining Spirituality and Finding Your Voice

For many Black women, the journey of questioning God and traditional religious teachings comes with a lot of inner conflict, self-reflection, and the painful process of challenging everything we’ve ever known. As explored in this Essence article, ‘I’m Spiritual’: Navigating Black Women’s Complex Relationship With Religion, Spirituality And Labeling Our Faith, the experience of redefining one’s spiritual path is not only common but an essential part of reclaiming one’s divine power and spiritual freedom.

When you’ve grown up with a certain doctrine, a specific belief system that has been passed down from generation to generation, challenging that system is often met with pushback, judgment, and shame. It’s not easy to say, “This doesn’t resonate with my spirit,” when your community has long upheld these practices as the only path to salvation and righteousness.

Yet, deep inside, there’s a calling—one that pulls you to explore a more liberated, decolonized spiritual practice. A yearning to connect with the divine in a way that feels true to you. But this yearning comes with questions. So many questions. And as soon as you begin to voice them—questions about doctrine, scriptures, or why certain traditions don’t seem to serve you—there’s often a swift response: “You don’t question God.”

The weight of these words can be heavy, leaving you feeling isolated and rebuked. There’s a particular kind of hurt that comes from being shut down for wanting to understand more deeply, for seeking a connection that feels authentic to your spirit. How can seeking answers about your spiritual walk be considered “questioning God?” This isn’t just a rejection of your curiosity; it’s a denial of your truth. It’s a message that your yearning for something deeper is somehow wrong, that seeking a new path is an act of betrayal.

For Black women, this experience can be even more profound. Spirituality has often been a lifeline in our communities—a source of strength, resilience, and hope in the face of systemic oppression. But what happens when the very thing that once gave you strength no longer aligns with your soul? When the rituals, teachings, and traditions don’t hold the same power they once did? When your spirit craves the wisdom of your ancestors, the energy of the Earth, and practices that speak to the essence of who you are?

In these moments, many of us find ourselves walking the line between two worlds—wanting to honor the faith traditions that raised us, while also feeling a magnetic pull toward something more ancestral, more freeing. It’s a journey of decolonizing not just our spiritual practices, but our minds. It’s realizing that our ancestors held wisdom long before organized religion came into play. That our connection to spirit, to the divine, is not something that needs to be mediated or controlled.

And yet, there is that ever-present fear. The fear of being judged. The fear of being accused of questioning God. The fear of losing community. The fear of what people will say when you start to burn sage instead of lighting a prayer candle, or when you speak of connecting with nature spirits instead of kneeling before the altar at church. The fear that you will be seen as “lost” when in reality, you are just now finding your way.

But as difficult as this process is, it’s also an incredibly beautiful one. When you allow yourself to question, to explore, to dig deep, you are giving yourself the gift of self-discovery. You are honoring your spirit’s desire to find what is true for you. And that is a gift that no one else can take away. This is not about disrespecting tradition; it’s about listening to the voice within you that says, “There’s more for me to learn.”

Whatever your spiritual path looks like—whether you are rediscovering the power of ancestral rituals, embracing the divine feminine, or simply learning to sit with your own thoughts and intuition—know that it is your path. There is no gatekeeper to your journey, and no one has the right to dictate what your connection to the divine should look like. This is the foundation upon which the Melanated Goddess Circle stands—holding space for Black women to explore their spiritual journey without fear, without judgment, and without shame.

So if you find yourself questioning, know that you are not alone. If you’ve been shunned for seeking answers, know that there is a place where your questions are welcome, where your voice can be heard. You have the right to seek your truth, to redefine what spirituality means to you, and to reclaim the divine power that has always been within you. After all, this journey is not about finding the way; it’s about finding your way.